How much cash should you give?
A cash gift follows the same logic as any wedding gift: how close you are to the couple and what you can comfortably afford. Cash isn't expected to be more (or less) than you'd spend on a physical gift - it's just a different form.
Typical to spend
$75-$175
A typical range for a friend. Close family often gives more; an acquaintance less. The amount is about your relationship, not a set fee.
Calculate your exact amount โSkip the "cover your plate" rule - what the couple paid per head is their business, not your target. Give a round, comfortable number and don't overthink it.
Cash or check?
- Check is safer than cash - it's traceable, and it can't fall out of an envelope. Make it out to one partner by name (couples often haven't merged accounts or changed names yet).
- Cash is fine too, especially in cultures where it's traditional - just tuck it securely in a card.
- Digital transfers are increasingly accepted if the couple has shared a handle, but only use one they've actually provided.
How to present it
Put the check or cash in a nice card with a short handwritten note, and either bring it to the reception (many venues have a card box) or mail it to the couple's home around the wedding date. Don't hand cash over loose - the card is the gift wrap.
Bringing it to the reception? Seal the envelope and, if there's no card box, hand it discreetly to the couple or a parent - don't leave it lying on a gift table.
Is giving cash rude?
No. The old idea that money is impersonal has faded - most modern couples welcome it, and many quietly prefer it. A warm, specific note ("toward that honeymoon in Italy") makes a cash gift feel every bit as personal as an object.
If you're not attending
You can still send money if you're close to the couple, usually a little less than if you'd attended - or simply send a heartfelt card. An invitation you can't accept doesn't obligate you to send cash.